So, firstly I'd like to mention that I have personally suffered with depression, temporarily, after a bad car accident and years of chronic pain and surgery. For two years I was medicated. Since then I have 'down' days. Do you want to know what helps me get through it?
No matter who you are, you will have down days.
Some worse than others.
Granted, some people's down days are way worse than mine. Some people wake up wanting to die, feeling that it's the only way to cope/release others from the responsibility of caring for them/ease the pain they feel at life. They can't help these thoughts. It's like they're built in to the psyche. Hard for the rest of us to understand I guess. Some people just feel down, low, blue and don't know why.
Down days happen. Accept it. Have the frame of mind that it will pass. It will recede a little, be less intense. You will feel better.
Take suicidal thoughts seriously
I've experienced suicide ideation. It was rather weird. As a result of a long period of incredible stress and anxiety I calmly thought of what it would be like to just let go of the steering wheel, crash into that tree and let life slow down for a bit. Until I realised I would probably be dead, or badly brain damaged and in a LOT of pain. Not to mention the terror and helplessness my family would feel. Nevertheless, my doctor took it seriously and we took steps to fix that.
Denying it doesn't help
If you deny that you are depressed or feeling suicidal you're not helping yourself by keeping it inside. Help is out there. But you must speak up. People don't always notice you're struggling. You may not realise this, but you're probably pretty good at hiding your inner turmoil. You joke around or you just don't engage much anyway. How will those around you know? It's up to you to tell them. Somehow. Accept that this has become a problem you need help with. There is no shame in being human. We all suffer in some way. Anyone who says they are never unhappy or have negative thoughts is a liar. No one has the perfect life either, so why do you strive for something that's impossible to attain? Speak UP!
Don't reject this out of hand. Your doctor is the first port of call. Before you go trotting off to yet another psychologist, have blood tests done. They can reveal a great deal abo0ut what is going on inside your bdoy that you may be able to change. Hormones run all body systems. Sometimes they get out of whack. Some nutrients may not be absorbed adequately and have side effects of causing depression. But you will never know if these secrets remain locked inside your body. Your GP will organise a wide range of tests based upon your age and gender. Certainly helped me to feel normal again!
There could be a physical reason
Depression comes in all flavours. It's unique as the individual who suffers with it, but there are some classic indicators and physical imbalances that can be addressed. Take action! Don't just let it was ho over you, stealing another day of your life.